The Ornament

This gorgeous barn is in a most unusual spot. Instead of presiding over a vast expanse of field, it sits on a waterfront lot on Gwynn's Island, just a few steps away from Hills Bay. I'm sure when it was originally built there was far more land separating it from the water than there is now, which makes it all the more interesting.

Here it is the day after Christmas, and you'd think that Chesapeake Bay Woman would give you a day off from the insanity that spews forth with more force than Old Faithful or a water main break in downtown Washington, DC. But the thing about insanity is it knows no breaks.

I'll compromise and not spew forth as much as I normally do, but in return you have to do some thinking.

See how you fare on this quiz.

Which of the following DID NOT occur in the Chesapeake Bay Family Household on Christmas Day?

a) Chesapeake Bay CAT not only slept on the dining room table all day but also decided to throw up on it--and the nice Christmas linens--just prior to dinner. Or rather, CBW did not excavate all that was atop the dining room table until just before dinner and only then discovered the cat and the throw-up, not necessarily in that order.

b) Chesapeake Bay SON walked barefoot on the roof of the house. This is what all children do on Christmas Day, no? While I was cleaning cat-produced liquids and solids off the table we were about to eat from, CB Son had to retrieve an errant remote-controlled helicopter from the roof, while his mother fended off compulsive thoughts of impending disaster which is inevitable when a 13-year-old is climbing a 10-foot ladder onto a 400-foot roof on Christmas Day.

c) Chesapeake Bay WOMAN burst into tears when she opened up a present from her children. It was the most beautiful ornament she's ever seen, and it had her first initial on it. CBW could not control the tears and blames them on stress, hormones and love, but mostly hormones.

d) Chesapeake Bay Woman went an entire day without seeing one sign of an insect infestation.

Correct Answer = (d)

Because what would Christmas be without some cat hairs, cat throw-up, moths flying around your living room and your son walking barefoot on the roof?

Correct Answer = Christmas Day in a nice, normal household far, far away.