In Mathews, there are no stoplights, plenty of winding country roads, and two kinds of drivers: NASCAR and Senior Citizen.
The NASCAR drivers come in two flavors: Truck Driving Bubba and Working Mumma. They know only one speed: WIDE OPEN, zero to 80 at warp speed, regardless of posted speed limits, sheriff's deputies or stop signs. Bubba and Mumma are in a hurry to get to nowhere--but quick!
Bubba's truck is jacked up so high you need an escalator to get in. The mud-caked windshield (from 4-wheeling) adds yet another element of danger when going around sharp turns on two wheels with Charlie Daniels playing in the background.
The NASCAR Mumma works "across the river" and is always running late. Her strengths include the ability to apply mascara, talk on the phone, steer with her knees, tailgate, honk the horn, smoke a cigarette and cuss like a sailor. Simultaneously.
Senior Citizens enjoy the quiet, small-town life that Mathews offers. Your Senior Citizen driver prefers a Buick (vintage 1984) and insists on wearing a hat (vintage 1940). The females in this category grip the steering wheel at the twelve o'clock position, instead of the recommended ten- and two-o'clock. This is due to the fact that they are literally hanging from the steering wheel trying to raise their eyes up high enough to see over top the dash. The male driver generally clears the top of the steering wheel, but only because of the required HAT. Seniors drive 20 mph below the posted speed limit and will signal one mile before their turn off.
At one time, there was a third category of drivers. For lack of a better term, I'd call them your "average" driver. This now-extinct species drove the speed limit, not too slow, not too fast.
The last known average driver was spotted in the 1980's. He's now a senior citizen.