For reasons that are still unclear to me, I volunteered to help coach track at Mathews High School.
I suppose I wanted to do something productive, something helpful, something that would make me feel I was a contributing member of society. As opposed to someone who plays on the computer for 9.5 hours per day and picks their toes for 2.
I've been to several practices now, and I've made a few observations about today's youth:
1. It is possible, and in fact deemed acceptable, to run sprints and talk on the cell phone. Simultaneously. The definition of talking on the cell phone includes NEVER REMOVING THE CELL PHONE FROM YOUR EAR FOR THE ENTIRE DURATION OF PRACTICE. OR LIFE.
2. Eating a bag of goldfish crackers takes approximately 45 minutes and is the right thing to do before running an 800-meter practice race.
3. Texting your friend takes priority over eating goldfish, socializing with the person running (oops, scratch that, nobody's actually running)STANDING beside you, and breathing.
Yes, all of this makes me feel better about myself, like I'm really making a difference. And I truly am,at least in the area of multi-tasking.
Now I pick my toes and play on the computer. Simultaneously.