Monday, August 3, 2009

Funeral Parlor

This old place, located across from the Tall Chief market in Syringa, was once a funeral parlor according to the market's owner.

It's perched at at an intersection of two back roads. Ordinarily--at least around Mathews--these intersections were homes to country stores, post offices, or both. Even today most of our convenience stores are located at major intersections. It makes sense to put a business at a place where travelers/motorists converge.

But a funeral parlor? On the corner?

I really find it hard to believe that such a charming house which is dripping in heart-shaped leaves was a house of death. (Go ahead and double click on either image and tell me those aren't hearts hanging from the vines.) But I'll trust the gentleman knows what he's talking about.

Funeral parlors always make me think of the funniest story I believe I've ever heard about someone's unfortunate passing. Click here to read about a local character named Mousie, his lawn mower, and a case of mistaken identity. Please read it, you won't be sorry.

Does this look like a funeral parlor to you?

Do you have an unusual story involving a funeral?

Isn't Tall Chief an unusual name for a market?

Is it really August already?

Did you know that if I didn't force myself to stop writing and asking these questions that I could keep typing until the cows come home or one of us ended up in the funeral parlor, whichever one is later?

Have a great Monday, and welcome to August.

(I'm forcing myself to stop now. You're welcome.)



Country Girl said...

It's difficult to stop sometimes, isn't it? I applaud you for your effort though and agree that yes, some of those vines are indeed heart-shaped.
I don't have any funny stories to share that involve funeral parlors and now am off to read yours! Have a beautiful day, CBW.

nativedevil said...

Two stories: My dad worked at a home funeral parlor when he was young. At the end of the night, the caskets were put on a rack and stored away. One day, another worker came in to see that one of the caskets had slipped off of the rack and the top had popped open. It scared the guy so bad he went running out and never came back.
Also, I am familiar with a funeral in which an angry man ran up to the casket during the service, jumped on top of it and started pounding his fists while yelling "Come out of there, you SOB, I know you're not really dead!"

Anonymous said...

The father of one of my previous secretaries died after a rather lengthly illness. My co-workers and I went to the viewing to show our respects. We had all met him, but hadn't seen him in quite a while prior to his death. My secretary just kept shaking her head in sorrow saying that it just didn't look like him after the illness. We thought nothing of it since we hadn't seen him in so long. The next day my secretary called to tell us that it WASN'T her daddy. No one figured it out until after the family had left and the family of another viewing across the hall kept saying "it just doesn't look like my daddy". Turns out they had swithched the bodies!! Only the grandaughter of my secretary had the good sense to not accept that it was him. She wouldn't go near the man saying "that's not grandpa!" Needless to say, the funeral was completely free LOL We all got a giggle out of it...just not in front of our poor secretary who was traumatized. All I can say is, thank God he wasn't cremated!!!


Daryl said...

The inability to stop is why I dont start ..

No funny stories about funeral parlors or funerals tho if traffic was heavy back then, it might have been to the funeral home's advantage to be on the corner and scoop up the dead ..makes me think of Monty Python and the Holy Grail .. throw out your dead ... ahem

Keeper Of All Things said...

Where did my summer go???

Meg @ Soup Is Not A Finger Food said...

Oh my, so glad you asked. I can't blog about this one, but I can share it here. Even though it’s more of a death story than a funeral story. My MIL and her sister and brother had all planned on being away during various weeks in February. During the same time, their mother was in the nursing home, unconscious, and taking a turn for the worse. However, none of the sibs planned on rescheduling or cancelling their vacations; why let your dying mother get in the way of your midwinter fun?? In fact, my MIL, who was heading to her timeshare in the Bahamas – not the vacation of a lifetime, but the 25th year in a row of the same thing – said, if she goes, don’t call me, and we’ll just have the funeral the week after we get back. Because, I guess, just as it’s nice and convenient to schedule a C-section, so, too, is it convenient to schedule a funeral.

Well, grandma DID go, and my MIL’s sister called her anyway, forcing my MIL to cut her vacation two days short. She had to call because the funeral director advised the siblings that they needed to get grandma buried because “she’s starting to turn.” UM. Ooooh. So, they threw together the funeral the weekend before it was scheduled and we all went and all was well.

Grandma J said...

Oh do I have a funeral story! I will post about it because it's long and drawn out....the chief character is Jack.

Now I have to go read Mousies's story.

Phil is excited about the pending arrival of the new member of our family. We don't think we will tell JJ...not a wise thing to do.

thank you!

mom x 2 said...

I must agree those vines definitely look like hearts. I just love to come here and read your stories... It just makes me want to come back and explore Mathews some more....

foolery said...

We threw a funeral for a mouse family once in about 4th grade. It was a post-burial funeral, actually; it was more of a memorial service, in truth. Or, a revenge memorial service, if you will.

Our teacher, whose hand had done the flushing that sent the mouse family to Mouse Heaven, was not amused.

In retrospect this isn't such a funny funeral story. It's a funny passive-aggressive story. Sorry.

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

CG-For me, it's always hard to stop. I need an Off button.

Nativedevil- Oh my - thank you for sharing those stories. You do have some up your sleeve. If you ever want to share some here, I am always praying for guest contributors since there is only so much I can blather on about. LOVE these 2! Would your father have worked at one of the local establishments?

Msseabreeze -I can honestly say I have never heard of such a thing - too funny (with all due respect to the poor daughter), but see, there is humor to be found in even the darkest moments. That's what I love about this life. Thank you.

Daryl-Yes, sort of makes you think about a drive-through funeral home. Hey, they have drive-through wedding chapels in Tennesses and Vegas, why not a drive-through funeral? "I'll take the #1 Extra Value Cremation, please."

Keeper-I regret to say that it's true. June and July are gone. Forever. Never to return. September is knocking on the door. I'm going to keep my door locked as long as possible...

Meg-Now THAT is some good stuff, seriously. "She's starting to turn..." You can't make that stuff up.

Grandma J - Cannot wait to read your story. Mr. Crab says hey.

momx2 - Come back this weekend, or any time you want. You might not have to sleep on the floor this time...

Foolery-Let me guess - you were in charge of the eulogy. Would have loved to have seen the services. Too bad there weren't cell phone cameras and hand-held videocams back then.

Monday is almost over, and I couldn't be more thrilled. What a long, exhausting day.

Mental P Mama said...

I just read about two men who just got married in the back garden of a funeral parlor. In The New York Times. Go figure.

Big Hair Envy said...

I don't have a good funeral story, but I do have some morbid cousins who think it's appropriate to VIDEO TAPE one's loved one in an OPEN CASKET!!! GAH!!!

Word Verification: mirdical
"It's a mirdical that I didn't pop a cap into their sacreligious (sp?) butts..."!!!

TSannie said...

Well, I have nothing to say....but I loved reading this!

Noe Noe Girl...A Queen of all Trades. said...

I have friend that used to be a funeral director- now he sells pools. Not so funny...let me go read about Mousie now!