Monday, April 16, 2012

Recycling





Welcome to Monday, where Chesapeake Bay Woman finds herself without any fresh photos or stories. However, since she's been tending the garden known as this blog for over four years now, she feels no shame as she reaches deep into the compost pit past to regurgitate a post for today.

The April 2010 photo above is from Bethel Beach.

The quiz below about taxes and/or death and/or escape to Bora Bora is from April 2009.

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Taxes and Death

To test your knowledge of exactly how the tax filing process works, and to provide a dawdling exercise for those who still have not filed, let's take this brief quiz.

Please put away all notes, don your thinking caps, furrow your brow and lick the tip of your pencil. Then recoil and spit quickly because lead is not something you want to ingest.

Ready? Begin.

1. Which of the following statements is true?
a) The only two things that are certain are taxes and death.
b) The only thing worse than taxes is a slow, painful death.

2. The best time to learn how to do your own taxes is:
a) As early in life as possible, it's really not that difficult.
b) Never.

3. Which of the following is more qualified than Chesapeake Bay Woman to handle tax filing, checkbook balancing, bill paying and/or anything else having to do with numbers, details, facts and figures, and most importantly discipline?
a) A CPA
b) A chimpanzee

4. Assuming you have the attention span and accounting abilities of a small kitchen appliance, when is the best time to drop off tax paperwork to your accountant?
a) Around February, by which time you should have received your W2's and all other year-end statements and required information. This also helps the accountant by giving her ample time to place careful thought into your income tax filing.
b) Two to three days before taxes are due, however you have to wait until your accountant leaves for lunch or goes to the bathroom. This requires several hours of heavy surveillance on your part to ascertain precisely when she will not be in the office. Ideally the receptionist is also on the phone and therefore distracted. Sneak into the office, drop your paperwork on her desk and run. Run very fast.

5. Besides incarceration, what are your options if you wait until the last minute and not even a CPA can bail you out by April 15th?
a) File for an extension.
b) Peruse the internet for jobs and rental properties in Bora Bora. Research the process for securing a passport, since yours expired back in the 10th grade and you never renewed it. Wonder how quickly it will take to procure airline tickets and a flight out, paying particular attention to those departing on or before April 15th.

Answers: You already know the answers. If you don't hear from me for a while, I'll sign on again once I arrive in Bora Bora.

Love,
Chesapeake Bay Woman

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April 2012 Addendum:  I feel much better about taxes this year since everything  was handed off to Dear Christine about a week or so ago, rather than a day ago.  This year things aren't so awful.
Still, I'm all for updating the passport for Bora Bora if anyone's else is up for the trip.

9 comments:

deborah said...

And I had all of the answers ready (Ha!)
Have a great week! Beautiful weather here, hope yours is the same-

Maria_NJ said...

Hello...

had a tumultuous weekend, the siblings and I had the estate sale at Mom's AND it was her 2nd anniversary...very exhausting and emotional, but we got rid of a lot...some really funny stories came out of it though...

CBW I found this on Slickdeals...I thought you may be interested...
http://shop.usa.canon.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/CusaMiscPageView?langId=-1&catalogId=10051&storeId=10051&file=friends_family/index.html&storeId=10051&catalogId=10051&WT.mc_id=C126149

its a 20% off coupon for refurbished Cannon cameras

http://shop.usa.canon.com/webapp/wcs/stores/servlet/product_10051_10051_268553_-1

it would bring the cannon powershot SX20IS down to about $220...
there are others too...

hope your weekend was way better than mine and have a good week...

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Deborah - The weather has been spectacular the past several days, just gorgeous.

Maria - Thank you so much for the links, I really appreciate it. Canon quoted me something like $300 for a refurbished version - $220 sounds way better. (Still waiting on the estimate for repairing the old one, but as I say I'm not optimistic.) Thanks again for the info.

Anonymous said...

That beach looks inviting. I wonder why there seem to be more little beaches on your peninsula than on the next one down (that has Williamsburg and all the other cities--is that the one called Middle Peninsula?).

Our plans to visit your neck of the woods are starting to gel. It'll be either the last weekend in April or first weekend in May (probably May since we want to do some kayaking, plus we're science nerds and we want to check out the simulators at this big science event in DC that weekend.) So far the plan is two nights in Williamsburg and then one night somewhere on your peninsula. Still looking through the various inns and cottages to see if we can find any great deals, or who knows maybe we might splurge since it's just one night.

Crossing our fingers that we might even see a dolphin or two while we're three--any suggestions for which beach/river viewing spot would be the best bet? Or is this the wrong time of year for that? --Betsy

Jamie said...

Today is the anniversary of the Big Deltaville Tornado. I would be lying if I said that the scattered storms forecasted for this Saturday didn't make me nervous.

I could use some time in Bora Bora. I'm coming to Deltaville for a whirlwind weekend instead. I think it will be just as pleasurable.

Betsy- the Middle Peninsula is the area between the Rappahannock and York Rivers, Williamsburg would be south of the MP. Above the Rappahannock is the Northern Neck.

Daryl said...

we missed you much this weekend ... and I am excited to say Toonman got his sh!t together and our refunds should be on the way ... Betsy/Anon ... I saw a shark, er, dolphin in the Bay in July ..

what?

its not Thursday?

Oh .. I didnt need 3 things ..

never mind

Rodney said...

I will need to flee to Bora Bora before the Tax Man comes......

Kay L. Davies said...

Bora Bora sounds like the best answer, no matter what the question.
K

Bluebird49 said...

I do believe that ALL your answers may have been correct on this post , my dear!