Monday, March 8, 2010

Blue Collar Joe's

Once upon a time on a late Saturday afternoon, Chesapeake Bay Woman was contemplating what to fix for supper. As she ruminated on the possibilities, which did not include doughnuts, she heard a knock at the door.

It was Mathews Mark.

He quickly handed her a beautiful box and said, "These are from Anonymous Hallieford Resident (who owns Sandpiper Reef Restaurant)."

Mathews Mark traveled clear across the state this weekend to retrieve his son from college, and along the way he stopped in Daleville, Virginia, where Anonymous Hallieford Resident's brother runs Blue Collar Joe's, home of The Very Best Doughnuts Ever, Ever, EVER Created.

Ever. I mean really. Ever.

It's very important to understand that Chesapeake Bay Woman does not eat doughnuts. She's really not much of a sweet tooth because she prefers overindulging in salty, greasy things as opposed to sugary, cakey, frostingy things. (Yep, it's a word, a word that comes out your mouth after you've eaten half a dozen heavenly doughnuts, some of which are covered in silver sparkles, M&Ms and gummy worms.)

But these are not mere doughnuts. No, they're incredibly beautiful, sinfully decadent, absolutely fantabulously delicious works of art.

Before Mark's truck even left the driveway, I had grabbed the camera and set about staging the doughnuts in the best possible late afternoon sunlight, as their heavenly scent made me drool dizzy and giddy.

(That's your first reaction at receiving a box of doughnuts, isn't it? Photographing them before even thinking about tasting them? Well if not you'll change your ways when you see these doughnuts, they are just that beautiful.)

Each and every doughnut was different. There was a coconut and a blueberry, but most of the others were exquisite combinations of gooey chocolate, creamy caramel, crushed nuts, sparkles and sprinkles and my favorite--crushed ice cream cone a la Nutty Buddy.

The Chesapeake Bay Children and I thought we'd died and gone to Sugar Heaven and gleefully forgot all about eating supper that night cut each one up in about five pieces and sampled and savored each one. Chesapeake Bay Son declared them delectable. Chesapeake Bay Daughter said they were the best ever. Chesapeake Bay Woman fell over backwards in a sugar-induced convulsion all the while still reaching for one more taste of divine decadence.

Blue Collar Joe's is located in Daleville, Virginia, which is quite a ways from Mathews. This is probably a good thing. If it were any closer, I'd have to change my name to Chesapeake Bay Doughnut.

Thanks, Mathews Mark, for dropping these off, and thanks, Anonymous Hallieford Resident, for thinking of me.

But most of all thank you to Mr. Blue Collar Joe for the best doughnut supper I've ever had. Ever.

Blue Collar Joe's website is The phone number for the World's Best Doughnuts is (540) 992-5637. When you call, please tell them that Chesapeake Bay Doughnut Woman is running low on insulin doughnuts and to please send another dozen soon.


Country Girl said...

Gorgeous donuts. I would have done the same thing you did. Photographed them first.
It's the right thing to do.

Anonymous said...

Aren't they amazing??!! It is always a happy day when someone makes the run to Daleville. MM will be making the run back to Tech this Sunday and stopping in for donuts and coffee. I will ask my brother to send you a list of the flavors so that you can handpick your next dozen!! (Bling-bling is my favorite) Also check out their donut cakes on Facebook!

Meg McCormick said...

I'm with you - give me salty and greasy over sweet any day of the week. But donuts? Well, that's a whole other story. I'm a slave to the classics myself - one plain glazed Krispy Kreme, hot off the conveyor belt? HEAVEN. Or white cream filled. (Not Boston cream.)

Send the Donut Fairy to Maryland with a dozen of those beauties, will ya?

Ann Marie said...

FINALLY I know who AHR is...
and I gained 25 lbs looking at your pics thank you very much...

either way I love you to pieces and sorry about the emotional vomit I threw on the blog comment yesterday...

much love..

Caution/Lisa said...

We had some gorgeous Panera Bread bagels yesterday and I can't really say that I thought for even one second about taking their picture. We are such savages here.

Mental P Mama said...

WOW! Is that near Cville????

Daryl said...

Yum .. of course I would have taken a photo of them before I ate them, otherwise they'da been gone in less time than it takes to replace the batteries in my camera ... and while

I do love me some sweets,but I need to balance them with the salty stuff .. wanna really get a rush? Have a Hershey bar (plain, no nuts) and a small bag of Wise Potato chips (not the BBQ kind, plain old fashioned salty tater chips) .. oh my ..

WV: pritort ... prit or t .. your choice

big hair envy said...

I'm sorry, but those doughnuts are just too darn pretty to eat!!!

Blue Collar Joe's said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Perry said...

I go to Roanoke antique hunting all the time, I guess I know where the next detour is !

Blue Collar Joe's said...

Wow…I don’t what to say but…Wow! This is like the best review I’ve ever read about anything. And I can’t believe that it’s about us! Thank you. Thank you. THANK YOU!!! I can’t tell you how much we appreciate this. For anyone who is interested, please "friend" on Facebook. (We're listed under Blue Collar Joe's, the person.) And if you’re ever coming this way, we are less than a mile off I-81, and only about 10 miles north of Roanoke. Hope to see you here sometime soon!

Jamie said...

I'm entering week 4 of a low carb diet.... I wanted to lick my screen

Breezeway said...

Can I just say that as much as I LOVE your blog, sometimes the comments are even funnier!!??? Ya'll crack me up on even the cruddiest (yes it is TO a word!) day! I have tears running down my face after reading Jamie's comment.
On that note... I adore donuts! And I'm not a cake kinda girl. But give me a double chocolate donut (which they do every morning at 7-11) and I'm a happy girl! On another note...I can't wait for blog fest! Hope I get to meet all of you!

Anonymous said...

OMG, I haven't been on line in almost 3 weeks...what a post to come back to. I am drooling at work. I better explain to the staff before one of the nurses thinks I am having a stroke or something!!! I just went to Blue Collar Joe's site....mmmmmmmmmmmm
I have a friend who goes to Ronoake about twice a month to visit family. I know what I'm asking her to bring me back next time!!


Anonymous said...

By the way, I just got off the phone with my friend. The shop is 5 or 10 minutes from her Mother's house, and her son's girlfriend (I think she said) works there. Wooo hooo...she promised me donuts next time she goes!!


Anonymous said...

MM will be driving that route next Sunday....if anyone wants some donuts you can order them at BCJs and MM will deliver them to Sandpiper Reef on Sunday.

Thanks for the nice write brother has done a great job and deserves all the accolades!


Anonymous said...

i live about 15 miles from BCJ's. and i am also glad they are on the other side of town, and that they open after i go to work..when placing your order you MUST try the blueberry cheesecake, very vanilla, and the botetourt BOG..(i couldnt tell if it was in ur pic)

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

CG-I knew you'd understand.

AHR-Yes, incredible. I don't do sprinkles, but these sprinkles were magnificent. I need some bling bling, for sure. Doesn't everyone?

Meg-Krispy Kreme, glazed, right off the belt, are other-worldly, you do have a point. However, these most definitely give KK a run for their money plus they're just so artistic. It's a feast for the eyes, the nose and the taste buds.

AM-Next time I'll save you one. Maybe. I'll try.

CF-Brutes! But I've never had a Panera bagel, so perhaps in your shoes I'd have done the same thing.

MPM-Near Roanoke, but within driving distance from C/Ville. I'm sure something could be arranged.

Daryl - You are singing my tune,sweet and salty together is the best.

BHE-I thought so too until I took my first bite, then all bets were off. It looks like a savage animal got to that box now, there's nothing pretty about it. Crumbs and chocolate smears everywhere.

Perry-You won't be sorry. Bring me some back, OK?

Mr. Blue Collar J. - No, thank YOU. Really, this is coming from a non-doughnut type of person - what you create is a masterpiece, something wonderful for all the senses. Do you sell coffee too? Heavens, if you do coffee as well as doughnuts, I might have to move to Daleville, as in yesterday. Hope to meet you when you come visit your sister next time.

Jamie-That could be dangerous, but is probably better for the diet.

Breezeway- This group of commenters is especially clever and witty. Hopefully you can meet them at Blog Fest, they're an incredible group, really.

msseabreeze-Congratulations on your nuptials. These are heavenly doughnuts, do take advantage of your friend's proximity to BCJ's you won't be sorry.

AHR-Remind me later in the week and I'll put up a reminder on Thursday's or Friday's blog post.

Anonymous-Oh, I cannot imagine living so close. My box did have a blueberry one in it (outstanding), but I'm not sure whether I had the vanilla or the Bog. There were so many different kinds but I didn't have their names, other than the default name of Heavenly.

Thanks again to AHR, Mathews Mark and Blue Collar Joe for the unexpected doughnut delivery, it was wonderful.

Mrs F with 4 said...

You really ARE determined to tempt me down to blogfest my fair means or foul, aren't you? Cruel, cruel CRUEL!

This sent me screaming to Tim Horton's for a fix. And ... it was just .... not..... the same.

Now I'm just trying to decide between making a giant pan of chocolate fudge, or a five minute chocolate mug cake. Or possibly both.

See what you've done? I blame MM for this... although... how far would he travel to deliver?

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Mrs. F., I'll cut you a deal. You travel here for July's Blog Fest and I'll make sure you have your own personal dozen of these delectable doughnuts. Or two, because one really isn't enough.

In the mean time, the next time I see Mathews Mark I'll ask him if his passport is up to date.

Breezeway said...

Mrs F - If you come to blogfest, please bring as much Tim Hortons hot chocolate as they will allow you to bring across the border! When we last visited our Canadian friends, my daughters got HOOKED on that hot chocolate! In July no less!