Wednesday, July 30, 2008

The Student

This is somebody else's porch. I snuck in their flower bed and quickly took this picture one evening. I don't normally trespass on other people's property. Although sometimes my definition of "normally" and "trespass" are open for interpretation. For example, I might consider it normal to trespass up to four times a year. Just as an example.

This week my sister had a birthday and she got engaged. ("Got" is definitely a helping verb. I learned this in my four years and three months in college.) I'd like to share a Middle Sister story with you in honor of all her great achievements this week.

Middle Sister was considered nothing short of a genius in school. This was because Chesapeake Bay Girl used to play school with her every single day when we were growing up. I had some sort of weird hang-up about needing to write on a chalk board and give orders. What I mean to say is that I really had an ardent desire to teach others how to read and write. And since there were no other available students, Middle Sister reaped the benefits of all my teaching.

As a result, Middle Sister ended up skipping a grade, she went to some Governor's School for the Gifted, and she was salutatorian or something like that when she graduated high school.

Now, with all that being said, I'd like to share an entry from her diary that is in stark contrast to the Middle Sister I have just described as genius:

Tuesday, January 6, 1976

Dear Diary,
Today we had to write on a famous* person in our unit. I wrote on Pocahontas. We had a stupid spelling test today. Write [sic] now or before I watched Mash. Before I had eaten ice cream and watched t.v. Tommarow [sic] is Wed. and it's my gym day. We get to skip** spelling. Today was fiar [sic].

Middle Sister


Hmmm. Spelling was stupid. She got to skip spelling. And yet the day was still considered fiar?

I'm no genius, nor did I attend the Governor's School for the Gifted, but I think someone ought not to have skipped spelling. It just doesn't seem fiar to me.

*Note: She originally spelled "famous" as "famoss" but then corrected it.
** She first wrote "scip" and then corrected it.
I thought it was important that you know this.

It's also important that you know that no matter how hard I try I cannot for the life of me figure out how to strike through text in this blog. I'll just have to ask my technology teacher, Grandma J.


Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Oh, and I also want everyone to know that all of the gaps and spacing problems on this particular post are entirely due to my delving into the "Compose" tab vs. the "html" tab when I wrote this. There is steam coming out of my ears right now, and I am madder than html.

Grandma J. please enroll me in the next session of Blogging for Idiots, I'll be the one sitting in the front row.

Keeper Of All Things said...

Thats to funny!!
And I can't figure out the line thing either!!!
I'd love it if you figured out how to take the verification off.......
I'm to lazy....I mean busy....sometimes to want to do it.

bobbie said...

The photo was well worth the trespass (and I'm not sure how to spell the last word of that sentence.)
Sounds like you did a good job of rearing that sister.
I THINK I know how to strike through now, but won't guarantee it.

Anonymous said...

Good thing we got to skip spelling after taking that stupid test. I'm sure in the next entry that I rated the day better than fiar. We got to wear the blue uniform in gym, which had bloomers. Time for cartwheels!!

-Middle Sis

tj said...

...Well set my pants on fire, you got a "link" in that last paragraph - now that right there calls for some sort of celebration CBW, does it not? lol... ;o)

...Could it be that Middle Sis' diary entry was sometime between CBG's rather strict & harsh teaching methods and the Governor's School for the Gifted teachings, no? (*giggle*)

..."snuck"...that word makes me laugh for some strange reason... And then the thought of you "snucking" (btw, spelin' corectlie iz sew over8ted) in some person's flowerbed just to get a killer photo makes me laugh all the more! lol... :oD

...Great stuff CBW! And I love it that your sisters chime in now and then... Now all we need is your Mom in here! ;o)

...Blessings girl...

tj said...

...Lemme know if this link works but here are instructions on how to do a strikethrough:

Grandma J said...

CBW, striking through text is obviously easier than teaching middle sister to spell. In front of the selected text(without all the spaces) < S > then at the end < / S >. the text is sandwiched between with no spaces.

And you do know middle sister reads your blog, and you do know both sisters have a new, revolutionary, long lasting lip gloss from lamcome. I say use paper cups on vacation.

just remember, no spaces between the brackets and s and /. they are keyed in with no spaces. Blogger wont accept my comment if I do it right.
email me if you want, then I can show you exactly what it looks like.

MommyTime said...

And just in case the "S" command doesn't work in Blogger (since some things really don't that should), you can use the words "strike through" (with a space between them, not all one word), enclosed in <> brackets and without the quotation marks, and you will get a line that looks like: < strike through>these< /strike through> this. (but without the extra space I've added, since Blogger won't let me put REAL html code here if it's not a code that it will let one use in a comments section, even though it WILL let me use this code in a post. Stupid Blogger.

Also, how appropriate that there's a post here today delving into Middle Sis's journal, since the very first line of MY post for today links back to you and your posts on old diaries!

foolery said...

I forgot what I came here to say.

Oh, I remember - may I borrow a cup of wine?

Anonymous said...

Ches, pass Foolery a sippy cup, will you? Thanks.

(You know I'm bringing sippy cups to the beach for our wine, don't you?

Wordpress has an actual strikethrough button on the toolbar, right there next to bold, underline and italics. It's so idiotproof, even I can do it. HTML makes me batty.

"Mean Mom" said...

Hi CBW...I also live in Mathews! On Buckley Hall Road. Found your blog somehow when surfin' the 'Net and have been enjoying your writing as well as your photos! I'll be checking in frequently...check out my blog when you have a chance...


Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

My eyes are officially crossed after reading these html-ish technical instructions.

koat- Ask Grandma J. She knows how to do it all. I would never be able to figure that one out.

bobbie-I did play a hand in rearing Middle Sister, but she'd never admit it.

Middle Sis - Thanks for being a good sport, and I do remember doing those cartwheels in the bloomers. However, please, please, please leave all those lancombe products at home.

tj - Yep, a link, but only after I had to ask Grandma J AGAIN how to do it because I'd already forgotten. I'll check out your link in a sec assuming I can uncross my eyes.

GJ - I'm gonna have to start cutting and pasting your instructions into a Word doc so I can refer back often. As in every single day because I will forget. I'm telling you, there's a market out there for folks like you to teach folks like me.

Hey, mommytime, thanks, I'll cut and paste your info to that Word doc. Thanks for the have to check it out. And thanks so much for the link/reference! I find these diaries incredibly entertaining, even if Middle Sis may not. (Again, thanks for being such a good sport, Sis.)

Foolery - YES. Absolutely.

sinaff - What the heck IS html? Nevermind, you can explain it next week after several sippy cups.

AMM - No way. I'll be checking your site out immediately.

"Mean Mom" said...

What, you don't believe that I live in Mathews? Lol. Name your time and I'll meet you at Food Lion. I'll be wearing a "Mean Moms Rock&Rule" T-shirt.

Thanks for commenting on my site. As for how to turn on a computer, that's easy. Turn the lights down low, play some "in the mood" music (I suggest Ravel's 'Bolero'). Maybe have candlelight inside of low lights. Whisper sweet nothings to the computer, slowly slide your hand down the side of the tower while telling it how handsome it is.

If that doesn't work, get back to me.

PS: You can email me at

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

mean mom - I do believe you're in Mathews, what I could not believe is there's another blogger in Mathews (it's nice to know).

I just came from the Court House/Food Lion vicinity and will be writing about that lovely experience for tomorrow.

tj said...

...Whew! (fanning self)...'Mean Mom', just readin' that lil' tidbit you wrote on how to romance your computer and lordy girl, you could write romance novels! lol... Are all folks in Mathews gifted writers or somethin'? ;o)


tj said... Fool'ry, like a cup'll

...Just kiddin'...Okay, now I'm done... ;o)

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

tj - Not that I am referring to myself, but I will put in a plug for Mathews as a very creative community, and the scenery provides just the right inspiration to create. We have many local artists, poets, writers, sculptors, musicians, jewelry makers and wine drinkers (because wine is an art form --as well as a science--after all).

There are only a few writers, however, who are skilled enough to use words such as "snuck" and "got" in the same post.

(Sneaked? No way am I saying sneaked. I GOT to use snuck! GOT to I tell ya!)

OK, I MUST stop dilly dallying and procrastinating and do something productive, such as say hello to my children for the first time today and emerge from my internet cocoon.

Big Hair Envy said...

Younger siblings rarely appreciate the sacrifices that we older siblings make for them. I, too, was addicted to the chalkboard, clipboard and whistle. I'm confident that my sisters reaped the rewards. All I got was a bad rap for being bossy!

Anonymous said...

"Sacrifices??" Good grief. Lancome, take me away.....
-Middle Sis

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Yes, that's right. Sacrifices. Like Big Sister is saddled with babysitting duties at way too young of an age, Big Sister has to do all the chores because Middle and Little Sister are too WHATEVER, and having to spend days on end instructing and teaching instead of playing.

There was never any lessons about lancome, though. Somebody else taught you that. Maybe it was Bozo the Clown?


But you really don't need all that much lipstick for crying in a bucket.

Anonymous said...

I don't remember anybody teaching me anything scholastic, all I learned was how to be MEAN! What happened there? Maybe I would have done a LITTLE better in school had you pitched in and what not...
P.S. Yesterday Mama said " it's DRIER'N A POWDERHORN HERE " which I asked, " what's a powderhorn?". The answer is:
I don't remember because I was too busy laughing at powderhorn.

Love, Little Sis

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Little Sis,

I was too busy with High Maintenance Middle Sis to pay any mind to you, plus you were "so" much younger than I. MIDDLE SISTER was supposed to teach you...

Dryer than a powderhorn? Nice, but actually we GOT rain last night. I've heard hotter than a race car wheel here lately.

Oh, and for anyone not asleep yet, stay tuned. MOTHER DEAREST has written not one but TWO stories for me.

I'll post at least one before Vacation from HTML.

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

Oh, and Little Sis - Powder horn is a device that Middle Sis uses to apply makeup.


Wendy said...

Love your pics. Found you on BearNaked's blog - when she gave you a blogging award!

TSannie said...

Sisters...nuthin' better....nuthin' worse! (I can do that strike through thingy 'cause Mental Mama taught me! Let me know if we can pass on our VAST knowledge to you.)

Grandma J said...

Ok, my back is out of wack, I used an obscenity on the phone with Sabastian from tech support for my wireless router, which caused our phone conversation to end abruptly. So after sitting on hold again, Angel helped me, but let me know that our conversation was being recorded...
So my point is, my laptop is up and running after 11 hours of excruciating pain. So I had to come back here and see what's going on. Kudos for the link! How did I miss that this morning? I'm dying to hear what mom has to say. I'm also a tad leery about that long lasting lipgloss. Paper cups.

Bear Naked said...

It is Friday 3:28 AM my time and all I can say is ????? about line through.
Will be back later this morning to try to figure this out.

Bear((( )))

Bayman said...

CBW, just for the record, you were clearly on the right side of the line, therefore no harm no foul. You still have your full compliment of four trespasses remaining.

"Mean Mom" said...

Hi tj...yep, it is a requirement for those who live in Mathews to be gifted writers. And eccentric.

Thanks for the compliments but I guess I just see things from an odd [erspective sometimes. So it was nice to discover CBW and then it was even more amazing to learn that we are within walking distance of each other. Small world.

cats said...

When you live in Mathews, we have a way of ignoring NO TRESSPASSING signs. My son has trails back in the woods. We ride on them almost everyday with the golfcart and dirtbike. The woods is beside our house and belongs to some guy that lives in Vermont. He'll never know. Is this a good thing to teach my son? It's okay to go on other people's property and treat it like it is yours? I don't think so. But we live in Mathews. That makes it alright.