Friday, May 22, 2009

Cub Cadet

OK. You don't have to tell me. I already know this is an awful picture.

This morning I went over to my parents' house to take a picture of what my father gave to my mother on Mother's Day. The particular item was garaged in their barn in a most unphotogenic location. From a distance, the barn is very photogenic. Up close...well I don't want to talk about it.

Yes, that's a screen door propped up on the left wall. No, I have no idea what that other junk is. Yes, we have an inability to throw anything away clutter.


Chesapeake Bay Mother has written a thank you note to CB Father for the touching, well-thought-out gift he presented her for Mother's Day.

Let's begin.

Mother's Day
by Chesapeake Bay Mother

We have a new addition to the family--a new Cub Cadet, well-appointed with headlights, beverage holders, and arm rests. Precision trained and not the sort of lawn equipment to turn on its owners*, we have high hopes for a long and happy working relationship.

Husband informs me on Mother's Day that it is one half of my Mother's Day present; the other half being the two bar stools I specifically requested for Mother's Day to complement my new kitchen bar. Somewhere along the line the words "bar stool" and "Cub Cadet" in the same thought sequence obfuscate down in Husband's mind to a spanking new Cub Cadet full of sound and fury and nary a concern in the world for what I wanted, asked for and was eagerly anticipating--two (2) bar stools.

When I asked about them, he said Home Depot was all out of them and every mother should be so lucky to have such a lawn mower. In years past, I have received a dishwasher, vacuum cleaner, and you get the picture.

So far, he has refrained from the annual septic tank pumping as a reward for motherhood, but there's always next year.

While I may have a gratitude deficiency, Husband definitely has tunnel vision for what he wants. For Father's Day, one half of his present is the Cub Cadet; the other half will probably be something expensive that, coincidentally, fits my ring finger. Before you go getting critical, just remember: one Christmas he gave me a drill.

Chesapeake Bay Woman Returns for Some Wasted Words Clarification

* For the record, CB Mother is talking about a tractor that tried to kill her, a tractor which turned on her. She is not talking about a tractor which turns its owners on.

If she were talking about that she just might be referencing CB Father who to the best of our knowledge has been riding that Cub Cadet since the day he brought it home.

For Mother's Day.


Grandma J said...

So between the Cub Cadet and bar stools, there was no sex involved...which was my guess at her Mother's Day gift.

Bayman said...

Shoot, I missed Three Ring Thursday.

Mental P Mama said...

I am feeling a little bit better about my power washer now.

Caution Flag said...

I got nothing for MD. Then last night Checkered walked in with one of those little 10" computers. Confession: It's so small that it makes me motion sick. It does, however, trump the vacuums, bathtub scrub brush, dusting tool, et cetera of previous celebrations.

I am quite envious of your mother's gift,but hope she gets even greater pleasure from her FD gift :)

Anonymous said...

I remember one Mother's Day or birthday that he gave her a "recliner" that only he used. She was a lot younger then, and her fury was undeniable. I'm still trying to recall what holiday they got the matching workboots for....never a dull moment around the CB Family home.

Oh, and I missed three thing Thursday, also. So, here's mine....Yesterday was my three year anniversary with Fiance. Step-son-to-be graduated from high school yesterday. Fiance and SSTB won their league championship (basketball) last night. Cool stuff!

-Middle Sis

Daryl said...

First of all that is a good photo, all it needs to be a winner is to adjust the .. never mind, its a good photo

And tell your Mom when I meet her I will fill her in on the 25th wedding anniversary gift Husband gave me ...

Lynne M. said...

I have to clarify - I am still pregnant for the next 5 1/2 months... I have severe pregnancy brain and nowadays have to clarify everything I say because of the severe pregnancy brain!

My poor husband...

CBM - I think your husband should have a 3-pronged Fathers Day gift. 1. Cub Cadet. 2. A BIG something to fit your ring finger. 3. 2 bar stools.

foolery said...

Wow, a recliner AND a Cub Cadet? Your mom is SOOOOOOO spoiled. : )

I remember the year Dad gave Mom a shovel. Can't say if it was the next year or not, but the bandages had at least come off when Dad gave Mom a RollerBall pen in a brown paper bag, twisted into a sort of wrap job.

After that he gave me money to shop for her.

Until three years ago when he gave her a deep freezer.

I think we may have the same father, CBW. And this was hilarious, once again.

mmm said...

Is it all about a need to fix things?

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

GJ-Good guess, but no none of that. Emphasis on none.

BM-Then how about Five Thing Friday?

MPM-I'd love a power washer. I'd use it to clean out my refrigerator.

Caution Flag-Nothing says love like a vacuum, does it? Unless it's a scrub brush. Men. Can't live with 'em, can't shoot 'em.

Middle Sis: Oh there are many things we could list that were less than desireable presents. He used to pick out furniture and it would show up and she'd have no say whatsoever in the selection, didn't even know he was shopping for it. The matching work boots as one of my favorites. We all benefited from that purchase since we could use those to skate on the ice/walk in the mud with our feet wrapped in bread bags. Ah, good times.

Daryl-Can't wait to hear this one!

Lynne M.-Your brain is fine, it's mine that's overloaded and declining steadily with each day that passes.

Foolery- Here's how scarey the similarities are...when I wrote this last night I deleted another asterisk/footnote that talked about how my father started giving ME the money (on Christmas Eve) to buy Mamma her Christmas present. Every single year. It was so stressful due to the last minute urgency of the request.

MMM-Yes, it's something to maintain/fix which keeps him busy, but the other attraction is the cupholders.

It's Memorial Day Friday. Heading out to....cut the grass. Not on their Cub Cadet.

Yee ha.

faye said...

If the rain ever stops, I will
roll out the Cub Cadet and let her rip... speed mowing at its best...
wheelies optional.

Chesapeake Bay Woman said...

faye-There's only one speed on a tractor: wide open.

The only way we could do wheelies was with a manual mower which at one time we had. Popping the clutch was awesome.

Anonymous said...

After a year of hearing; "...sure wish I had a tractor that worked..", "...I'm really tired of that broken washing machine...", "..would you look at how ugly those diamond ear rings look on that movie star...", "..I dropped my ring down the garbage disposal, again.."

Is it any wonder that a guy can't do anything right...

(Single Male Blog Stalker)